I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
you're like a bully in the Christmas story
It must have been true love
I don't call true love eating a bag of doritos and then going down on each other
Definitely still drunk while signing the 'responsible adult' form at the hospital
Just got a blowjob on the pier where my great-grandfather entered America.
so the good news is that i can't possibly burn my eyelashes off tonight at the bbq.
he just flipped me off the bed, said "deal with it", and came on me.
It's 10AM, she's drunk blaring veggie tales and I have a paper to write you've got to be fucking kidding me
Either I spilled whiskey on my boobs last night or they are fermenting. Not concerned in the slightest
AND HOLY SHIT FLUBBER IS ON NETFLIX
I woke up with the gnarliest cold/hangover combo
Thats what u get when u have butt ass naked rooftop sex at night in december
Worth it.
Interesting. All i can really say is humanoid shaped doritos bags melting very slowly
Good rule of thumb: only list personal references with whom you have hallucinated
It's been so long since I had sex I might propose to the next girl who will sleep with me.
I have easymac and six pack of beer. This night can't get any better.
Randomize
