its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
Never again let me pretend to be australian for free booze.
I couldnt give him head when all I could hear was his little brother playing the piano and this family singing along to it.
Drunk versus high capture the flag: what team is everybody gonna be on?
The great thing about skinny blondes is that they're all interchangeable.
Well, at least he doesn't refer to you as his associate. his mattress associate
I'm wearing red that night.
Noted, what shade?
Whore.
Come find me, I'm the girl sitting alone in taco bell at 9 in the morning drinking concealed beer with a straw
PA to anyone at the party last night and wondering where your pants are: they are in my backyard.
Nothing like banging your nurse in the shower while staying in the hospital
Grandpa just put 6 jello shots on his plate. My aunt tried to take them away; he flipped her off. Living in the retirement home has hardened him.
Kid got so high from the brownies he forgot his own name. Welcome to college.
Pennsylvania now holds the distinct honor of being the third state I've crapped my pants in.
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
Randomize
