Those strippers last night smelled great. It was the perfect mixture of vanilla and daddy issues.
Bisexual people are plain selfish.
Dude, she looked like the Canadian Slam Poet, neck hair and all.
I just found glitter on my vibrator... whatever we're doing has to stop
seeing an 80 year old woman puke in the bushes changes everything...
that's spring break in florida for ya
he said "cool" when i took off my bra and proceeded to stare wideeyed at them the ENTIRE time. it was like sleeping with the kid i showed my boobs to for the first time in 6th grade.
[insert really romantic bullshit about how much i love you and how beautiful you are so you will suck my dick tonight]
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
he had me stop mid-blow job to make me use my phone to id a song on the radio..
i wasnt really sure how to responde to that.
I need to start using my boobs for good instead of weed. Although really they're kind of the same thing
I knew I'd like her from the moment she supported me messing around with my co-worker on my lunch break
It's like I'm getting a welcome home parade with sex!
I can't wait to get to LA so I can punch her in the face
Got caught peeing in public. Sucks. It was a police station. Sucks worse.
What the hell was that?
Genius. It was sheer genius.
Randomize
