She made the grapes disappear! ALL OF THEM!!!
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
I can make a handprint turkey for extra credit in history. I feel like the word college should be in quotes on the school letterhead.
Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
dude relax anyone of us could have gotten that girl pregnant
Half my make-up was stuck to his thigh where I'd fallen asleep after the blowjob.
I think showering with 5 people and a half gallon of vodka was one of the best decisions we have ever made.
I guess birthday shots aren't always the answer
all I'm saying is if you're gonna fuck a fat chick do it in a pool it's like zero gravity or something
how did you graduate high school
I used my iced coffee to ice the bump on my head from last night
Literally had a conversation with the pizza as to why it was a bad idea to reach in the back seat and grab a slice while driving. The pizza was right, it was safer to just wait until I got home.
I need a hobby that isn't dick related
My butt remains clenched, sir.
i now know why i keep getting pictures of poop. apparently someone put my number in a girls bathroom saying i am a poop lover.
you text any of them back? this is probably the most women you'll ever have texting you in your life. don't squander a good thing
when they cut me off i played the entire Justin Bieber playlist and left for another bar that didn't think i'd had enough to drink
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