One of my boys faked an orgasm while fucking a girl tonite, w/ out wearing a condom mind you.
She caught him, and immediately put her clothes on and left.
I'm dreading the fact that when the dominoes guy comes, he will ask me if i placed an order under the name "high as shit".
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
You do realize that we bought beer at 9:30 in the morning to avoid sobering up. Stupidity was bound to follow.
I believe I convinced two girls to makeout for freedom last night Hahaha
Well I tried to call you. I was convinced my body was made of wood. But the Xmas lights in my room helped
But Alex is drunk in Philly and I told him to come see me so that's "first-love,-drunk,-high,-and-it's-a-snow-day-hook-up-with-an-ex" points. 69
I just took my birth control with a water bottle I found in my purse with vodka in it in Spanish class. 10am is still too early for me.
were you high?
When?
Actually just blanket yes to that question
Oh thank Jesus fuck for my shitty infertile womb. Crisis averted
Lab coat again saves the day - hiding embarrassing shart evidence...
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
I slept with one of the directors so you would get a good price on the ballroom for your reception. I'm the best MOH. You owe me bitch
I'll have to start mass sending dong pics to get the recognition I deserve
I think my brain is throwing up inside my head. How do you live like this?
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