I'm kindof freaked out about my cock not getting up this morning. Cove over later so I can sort this out. Do not post this on texts from last night.
Damn that would have been a great one. Hahah and don't worry...
Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
We're like two naked peas in a sex pod.
We argued about the championship during sex. Absolutely the manliest moment of my life.
he just spelled fiance, "pheancie". I dont think he's ready to get married.
Chillin with my Grandpa and my grandma tells us there is a tornado warning. My grandpa then says "We'll go hang out in the basement, we can bring the keg with us." This is why I love coming home
He googled the address of the bar, then sent me a text saying "6.3 miles. Too far. :( Apparently I am only worth a 5 mile radius.
I'm just gonna ignore the fact that I have no pants on and find a way home. A good one-nighter never goes back for his pants.
Well I think it's fate. Considering march is my fave month because it's my birthday and st. Patrick's day. And his name is Patrick. I'm sleeping with him all through march. No question.
somehow he and i always have our deepest conversations after phone sex.
lets do drugs on my lunch break tomorrow
I mean in all honesty I would let James Franco shit on my chest. End of story
My lighter is stuck in my beard.
What started out as a one night stand ended in him texting me the next day, saying he thought he was gay.
She’s 47 and wants me to fuck her on her mom’s hospital bed
Randomize