with your own penis?
her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.
You came in at two thirty, wearing your underwear and a tie then asked where you could find a sombrero and a pair of stilletos that would fit your men's size thirteen feet.
we had you propped up in a chair and fed you donuts. i've never seen you happier
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
At one point I went looking for you and found you handcuffed to a chair. I'm pretty sure you handcuffed yourself. I don't know how you got there.
I caught him trying to shit in her bed. I asked him why he was doing it and he said "because it's wrong."
You talked about giving to sperm banks on a first date. What did you expect?
After being his wingman last night, I've decided I will never talk about becoming a lesbian ever again. Picking up chicks is way too hard.
as he was fingering me, all I was thinking about was how lucky his girlfriend is...
Well she got high, deleted the essay she was working on, and then ordered dominos. We all manage stress in different ways.
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
I had to rename my dildo. I met a little kid who named his teddy bear the same name. It just felt wrong.
THE COP WHO TOOK MY MUGSHOT LAST NIGHT JUST ADDED ME ON FACEBOOK
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