It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
So my retainer doesn't fit, so i'm getting drunk so i can put it back in. Alone.
You would...
Last time I get high to write a paper the night before it's due. "Tiny Wings and sexuality" is not an acceptable topic to for a paper. Class in 30 minutes. I'm fucked...
I just found a casserole dish in my oven filled with broken glass, blood, and chopsticks. And the REALLY fucked up thing is that finding it answered more questions than it raised.
how do you not remember that?! you winked at the bouncer and then proceeded to grind on him while chugging a beer. i don't know if i should be proud or embarrassed to be your friend
I'm almost positive that you shat in a birdhouse
this is the first time i'm angry at someone with so much boobs. she like managed to break my glass and my phone with one glorious swing
how does spending your day off taking me to the hospital sound?
All I remember is while we were making out M.A.A.D City came on so I pushed him off of me so I could rap along.
I named my Roomba after my pot dealer. I have a problem, don't i?
But really, someone with a penis give me attention before I start posting nudes on Instagram.
Completely unrelated and mildly related, a guy I hooked up with last year in a threeway died, his obit photo was his Grindr photo
Well I'm nervous now about the consequences of letting you loose
It's a big decision, I respect that you need to think about it.
I woke up on the hammock spooning a box of Cheese Itz.
I would cock slap so many things if I had a cock.
Randomize