so i realized that everyone figured out i was a slut before i did. then i realized that no one felt like telling me. sometimes i think you just keep me around for entertainment.
you're right.
Ridin mah bike see you on the moon
he told me I talked like a deaf person
Dude dan is so baked he taped his remote to the futon so he couldn't lose it again. Come over here
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
I just decorated my birth control case with Lisa Frank stickers. If that doesn't scream 'I'm not ready for babies' I don't know what does.
I just ate four packages of Swiss Rolls. Being high and on food stamps is AHmazing.
He's like Medusa, you can't look directly into his eyes or you'll turn into a slut.
Being thankful with your family is one thing. Being thankful with your friends while getting drunk and smoking bowls while eating leftovers, priceless.
So aparently telling your roommate you're going to spoon them so hard in the public place of their employment is inappropriate
I took in his dog. My exboyfriend still calls me for 2 things, blow jobs and animal rescue. I need to end this cycle
Yeah I just gotta do it so that my major doesn't find out. Doesn't look good having a stripper teach your 3rd grader
I just showed this kid my nipples to work my shift tmw
i got woken up by a cockroach crawling onto my hand and now i'm pretty sure i'll never be clean again
You ran up a $300 bar bill on his card and he didn't have you arrested, be grateful and move on.
Randomize
