Boobs. All I remember is boobs.
so looking at the guys i've dated i feel my vag is a halfway house
The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
I dig being used for consequence free sex. Not consequenceful sex.
They let me out of the holding cell just in time for me to get the morning-after-pill. Rock bottom feels even worse with all those hormones.
We need to play Chardee MacDennis. Contact me when you have an available date. This is not a question.
we are out of drugs. and patience. please bring former.
Sorry I didn't take you making out with him all night as a hint you wanted nothing to do with him...
im so proud of her that she got shit faced finally. This must be what it feels like to see you kids get their diploma or some shit.
I told her my hands were paint brushes and her vagina was my canvas
The fun I thought I would be having now when I was six is vastly different from what I am currently doing. Hurraaay sex and vicodin.
I opened a bud lite with a fencing sword last night. Yeah you banged that guy.
I went out to have a smoke, and next thing I know, he's got me bent over a picnic table praying to deities I don't believe in. You should have been there.
good news: i got laid. bad news: by your boyfriend
So my furniture is upside-down, two lamps are glued to the ceiling, and there is a kitten sleeping on Kyle's face. Please tell me what happened last night....
Randomize
