By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
Her best guy friend really had a thing for her all along.... Now we're back together and he's gone Dawson's Creek with his away messages.
I'm still seeing blue. who wrote on my bare nipple?
after we had sex he told me his original plan was to have sex with my roommate but his buddy likes her so i was backup
i'm sure the inside of her vag looks like Normandy circa 1944
and yes i had to double check that date for that joke to be accurate
I've had more sex in the two weeks since we broke up than I ever had in any two weeks we were together.
The first clue should've been that he literally had shit in his hair. How does that even happen?
We enjoyed our moment of partial gayness together
She asked me to go inside, make myself a drink and slip into something a little more naked.
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
After much deliberatipn and vodka, my favourite phrase of Christmas 2012 is "penis of last resort"
I don't know if I want context or not...
Context involves faux incest and champagne. Id go into detail but im on shot number 5.
We all have to be good at something. Mine are writing, drinking, fucking and peer pressure.
Just drug him and when he wakes up say "You just woke up from a coma, we've been married for 5 years." It'll be like The Vow but fucked up.
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
She's not allowed to do acid anymore... she started crying because she thought she was an eagle.
Randomize
