nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
i thought she was just hairy. i didn't know she was also a man.
I think I gave almost everyone at that party the clap last night
Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
the condom got lost in my hair
she said your name and I thought she was asking me to motorboat her. Best. Miscommunication.Ever.
I took it to a new level. I'm procrastinating taking my adderall. Hate finals week.
He said he wanted to have kids with me so they could grow up to be professional linebackers. Not. A. Complient.
I'm not embarrassed about the lap dance. I'm embarrassed for the singing during.
At what point did you think the cops were actually coming to hang out with us
You cant hold me accountable for my actions when im high.
Knowing that he goes to voodoo every Thursday really makes me want to get myself checked.
When he texted me, I got a little wet. Until he asked me to get Jimmy Johns before I got to his house.
FUCK. EVERYONE MAKE MY CONTACT NAME DADDY ISSUES
We celebrated Cinco the right way. We took shots of 1800 then he fucked me while Selena was on TV in the background
I just masturbated at work... Don't know why but I thought you should know
Randomize