I need hand sanitizer and jesus.
yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
He said he loved me so I pretended not to hear it because I don't think "I love your penis" was the response he was looking for.
I just wanted to hook up with a white guy to prove that i could go back.
i'll prob lay in bed. its weird not having to track my wallet down, its become such a weekly habit. i suddenly have so much free time
Never again. Her vagina looked like a sad old man.
He sent me $300 worth of sex toys. My clitoris went into hiding after two days.
Not sure why I sent you a picture of a black bear last night but it seemed like a good idea at the time.
But youre all cute and shit. Woo that cunt. And by cunt i mean strong independent woman
I don't think it's considwred fine dining when you're passing out at golden palace in chinatown at 4 am with you boss who happens to be wearing a dress.
Enjoy the penises
On a side note. I slept with a stuffed giraffe last night. Found it in my bed when I came home and snuggled with it. Drunk me reverted to being 2
Lady at the airport across from me just pulled a cat out of her bag. can't deal with this right now..
Damn, I just did coke with a dude in a bathroom and after he took his dick out right in front of me and took a piss. What a power move.
I don’t care that he’s a decade younger. He’s cute and I need a good penising
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