some dude just recognized me causeg he had a pic of us making out onvhis phone
She told me that she had to rub her face against me because she was part cat.
im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
he kept refering to his penis as the "eternal sunshine"
This is drunk me apologizing to sober me in advance.. I am sprry about you're trashed house. Mom an dad will be home by 5 so get up and clean. P.s. Mike is in the closet passed out.
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
IT'S LINGERIE PURCHASED FROM A FLEA MARKET, THE ONLY THING IT'S GOING TO BE POSITIVE FOR IS A TEST FOR HIV
I drank half a bottle of wine while watching the Olympics opening ceremonies. I catcalled at handsome athletes. Stop me.
On NPR this morning, farmers are feeding weed to pigs. The result: pot bacon. Life just got better.
there are no losers in shot checkers. only winners.
I'll pass on that plan. The lack of my penis in new vaginas is no where on the itinerary.
I checked her ID this morning. Lets just say...she's older than my mom
Girl I'm contemplating picking up some adult diapers. That's how bad this is and it's only day 2.
Just letting you know that I just spent 11 dollars on a car wash... Because you had sex in my car.
You weren't singing into a microphone in front of an audience. You were screaming into your fist in the check-out aisle in Walmart.
Randomize
