ok this guy next to me just sat down with a no joke, 10,000 page book, popped an addy, cracked open a red bull and opened the book to page 1.
The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
He kept buying me shots of tequila. I decided to just save myself the half hour of toilet hugging and tell him straight up that I intended on sleeping with him. We got Tacos on the way home with all the money we saved.
he told me my vagina was like a beautiful piece of salami
Oh, and that ugly chick transformed into a veritable goddess when she came back at 3AM with a handle of vodka and 100 chicken wings
Uh oh. Middle aged belly dancers. And they just got out swords. Shit is about to get real.
Most of the bar is playing trivia I'm playing destroy a relationship in twenty questions
you owe me at least a beer for the services my girlfriend just provided for you
If you were awake I would probably ride my bike over, fuck you like a god, leave you in the wonders of life, and bike home
I just woke up under my desk. Not to worry though, no one is in the office yet
Did she owns a vibrator that will set off seismic activity.
Oh Jesus. Are you going to the hospital?
No I'm showering then leaving for Vegas
I've only hooked up with engineers this year and it may be the best future financial decision I've ever made
And he kept lifting up his shirt every few minutes to check if his nipples were still there
Randomize
