I'm in your bed right now
Okay meet you there give me 10
Don't think you can make me leave either
Give me ten I ha e to be ******'s wingman I want you
i caught the condom in my mouth.. dont ask me how
He just came into the room wearing nothing but a Speed Racer helmet. I think he just invented a fetish.
There are a bunch of guys at the door looking for the guy you brought back to the condo...pretended not to speak English. You're welcome.
Dude they have your information. Come back. The sheriffs office is here, they are pissed..please come back otherwise jail is inevitable. Call me
Used a cardboard box as a pillow and a towel as a blanket. Its like the great depression over here
Pretty sure he sprained my tongue. This is why you don't hook up with gingers.
It's just weird. It's like Big Bird dating Meg Griffin.
There's cereal in my underwear. Was I in your apartment at any time last night? That's the only logical explanation for this.
They ran out of toilet paper, so I had a girl rip down the streamers so I could wipe.
I'm going to teach Troy such valuable life lessons. Yesterday I told him to stay away from girls who drink redbull and vodkas.
Rather than admit to myself I've spent $756 at the bar this month, I'm just going to pretend I gave it to a homeless person...kind of makes me feel better.
It was just a matte of pubes and mustard.
The guy whose porn password I use finally renewed his membership. Lazy fucker had been slacking all summer.
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
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