I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
Since my computer broke, i've been masterbating to girls gone wild. I feel like i'm in the 90's.
I woke up this morning with a bag of pepperonis in my bed.... and my facebook status was "pepperonis"
I've spent the last three hours watching 30 rock and eating marshmallows and ham. I'm considering taking up weed to justify my lifestyle.
you were on ground yelling about how close the floor was to your face.
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
Ok... I'm a little jealous... Grab her pig tails and ride her like a jet ski. Making motor noises is optional.
Don't bother coming over to clean the mess. I already paid two kids 5 bucks for it, just didn't tell them you peed all over the place. You do owe me 5 bucks though
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
These kids are nice. Shrooms make everything so nice.
don't give me stepladders when i'm stoned.. i woke up to a slice of balogna nailed to the ceiling
Sent him a nude and I forgot to crop out the Jesus picture in the background. The Catholic guilt is too real.
We had sex on his sofa while his friend cheered and threw bugles at us
He left me alone in a hotel room my last night in town to go home to jerk off and watch TV. So yeah, I guess we're not really friends.
She came into the salon and said, "Don't judge me. Yes that's cum in my hair and I want a shampoo, cut and style."
Randomize