They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
we left the bar for like 10 minutes last night and moved his car so it wouldnt get towed. neither of us have a clue where it is right now.
Someone should've told Pope jumper lady and terrorist pants guy that the Worst of 2009 lists already went out....
Just saw a cop give four blondes gas for their car on their way to Vegas. They seriously ran out of gas and called 911 about it. Its like a porno plot.
Sexual tension squid is drowning in the sexual tension
Let's get one thing straight; we aren't in a relationship. We fuck and occasionally go to subway.
DICK PUNCH EXTRAVAGANZAAAAAA!!!!!
I suggest absurd amounts of masturbation this weekend to build up the necessary calluses
Any time you've had a failed relationship, I blast No Sex for Ben by The Rapture and dance around my room. I wish I was joking.
I have the relationship skills of Miley Cyrus and I could've said this was a bad idea
They had to take me to the ER because I got a concussion in a parking garage. Not partying with lesbians for a while
Should I take a fireball shot or brush my teeth?
Serious question: is he hot or is my vagina just that barren?
the cops drove by and you were on your back in the middle of the side walk with your arms and legs in the air yelling that you were a dead bug .
Got any extra dick over there? I’m running low
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