We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
first missing my period. then crying at the clinic... but why?
we had sex 3 months ago. you missed your period 2 weeks ago. but nice try.
he was so hot that i framed the used condom. it's not trash, it's art.
Anyone who says sunshine brings happyness has never woken up with the worst hangover of their life to their window being open and it being a bright shinny day
chasing schnapps with beer is a terrible idea. never been drunk at 3PM before. please help please please please please
I sent him a pic of my tits.. All he said was, "oh your sun burn"
He looks like he has a penis
What the fuck
A good one, a good penis
While eating post sex burritos I dripped taco bell sauce on my boob. He licked it off and asked why I hadn't thought of that before.
He's not messing around tonight. 4 fist pumps.
Maybe I'm nitpicking, but that looked more like how one would jerk off an elephant than it did playing air guitar.
I came so hard I literally levitated off the top of his dick. Gravity was no match for that orgasm!
I just realized I have a habit of pre gaming for therapy visits. Problem?
We'll discuss it when you get here
Well I've decided to refuse to conform to society and be naked the rest of the day.
Of course my parents remember you. You showed them your tits
When we were finished she immediately got up, cut a star out of a piece of paper, colored it gold, taped it to my chest and deemed me the Sheriff of Sex.
Randomize
