Just wanted to let you know that if you need my services as a male dancer for his birthday, let me kno so I can clear my schedule
It was like a fairy tale, until he tried to put it in my ass...
at one point he was caressing me in the kitchen asking me my name over and over again and then asking what my favorite continent was
It's home.......I'm going to the store in disguise to get skittles and cake frosting. Then I'll eat the frosting in a dark corner while I cry and wonder what I did to deserve this.
Now I get the fucking shakes every time I hear I'm Sexy And I Know It. Thanks, Captain Morgan.
It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world.
This bitch rocks a fuckin fanny pack and still manages to lose her phone at every thirsty thursday
Is valentines day the worst or best day to ask for a threesome? I'm weighing some options on this high-risk manoeuvre.
I have to date her we need a place to stay for tailgating
If your night didn't end with writing a witness report for the cops at a shwarma place, your night was probably less interesting than mine.
For the first time in my life, I may be the most normal person in the room.
Update: I am definitely the most normal person in this room. And the least tattooed.
I think you handled your pregnancy scares better than that cricket in your bathroom
I guess what I'm trying to get to is that my dog sneezed on my dick earlier and its really taken the joy out of my evening.
I just want a guy who will spank me, fuck me, then take me to my office xmas party. I'd that too much to ask?
You've been inside me, dude. There's no such thing as TMI.
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