How do u get a lost condom out? Like really lost... up there...
So I pulled my t-shirt down, pushed my boobs up and marched right into that church!
Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
He managed to light the Jello on fire...
I've already reverted to sweat pants. And lonely drinking.
I rode a bull tonight, There is absolutely no reason my dick is not in some chicks mouth
Apparently he crashed because 3 different girls were trying to give him road head at the same time.
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
I FOUND AN AUSTRALIAN THEY CALL VOMMING 'RAINBOW SNEEZING' I'M NEVER LETTING HIM LEAVE EVER
Sadly he is straight as an arrow that is designed by a robot computer from the future with lasers.
This saddens me. Mostly because I want to see the schematics on that robot.
Face washed and sleeping pill taken. Here's hoping for a more sex filled tomorrow.
yeah she's crazy. she fought a possum in my alley because it was "being a cagey little cunt"
My butthole probably tastes like a Cinnabon right now
Once again, your first date sounds like something of an epic. Odysseus' Quest for Fourth Base.
So, do I need to remind you to keep it classy tonight?
No, because if you have to be reminded it isn't classy.
Randomize
