I got everything I ever gave her back, every picture, and money for the dog. I didn't want it she brought it all back and gave it to me. clothes jackets, pictures, dried flowers, ear rings, necklace...
Sell it on ebay and let's go to the bar
I was doing the dishes wondering what was with all the tiny little cups, but then I remembered that some people drink things other than huge mixed drinks and big cups of water the next day.
If you try to operate on me with a Bic pen and vodka, I'm never talking to you again
I gurantee you I'll be the only one dressed as a giraffe.
She is screaming bc she thinks you jumped out the window...please show her you just went out for a smoke
Oh man, buzzed lunch fridays almost got out of hand.
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
Are you considering all the consequences of doing your boss or are you just rationalizing with your vagina?
Welcome to drink and talk like a Russian afternoon.
Pirate drinking day will be planned for shortly
I approve this so hard.
We got really stoned and then we fucked. Then he made me a panini.
Oooh, he sounds pretty classy
Actually, not at all. We were stoned so he made me a peanut butter panini. With a Rollo in the middle of it. And he left the panini press on all night. I could have died.
I have my vibrator between my thighs and I'm listening to high school musical. That kind of high. We're all in this together.
I think everyone at the office can tell I'm dehydrated
you mean still drunk
I've heard it both ways
Yeah just had sex and grub hub came right after he did. I’d say it’s a win.
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when I get back.
Which one have i been cheating ON and which one have i been cheating WITH if i met them the same night & have been dividing time equally?
Randomize