Yo dont text me then not text me
just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
Well, let me tell you, it was the most vivid sex dream I've ever had. More so than the Paris Hilton one I had in 05. And about as weird.
I wasn't hungover this morning. My head just hurt because someone tried to suction cup a dildo to my forehead.
Uggh answer your phone, you are the only one I know who'll be proud of what I woke up next to this morning .
So the bitch asked me if I wanted the name brand or the generic contraceptive. Does it look like I want to be generically pregnant?
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
And. I know i am a gay man cause when i saw the pic of his cock his feet were in it and i am like what the fuck?
Ok there's 63 pics of you jerking it on my camera from New Years. The time stamps say it took you 40 min to get there too. See a doc, your only 22.
I put ketchup in a girls hair last night. I need a sorry balloon
Have you ever had chicken nuggets while high? Because it tastes like hearing the Beatles for the first time
Its honestly only a matter of time before I punch him in the face... I'll try to control myself until you guys break up
Are you in a good mood because I stuffed you with enchiladas, ice cream, penis, and cuddles last night?
Unless it has to do with ramen, goldfish, cheese, or rugby, don't talk to me.
I don't actually like you. I just want to hook up with you.
I'm fine with that
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