I had a dream last night where you were a transsexual in a low cut blue dress with lovely long brown hair. You were very pretty. I hope you are well.
If I had known I was gonna take my tights off and throw them over the balcony I would have shaved my legs.
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
Was I wearing clothes when I handed you your keys. Please tell me I was wearing clothes.
I had sex on an exercise ball. The inevitable has occurred.
I just feel like a little gay dolphin in a massive sea
I dunno. Last time I went there I had got sexually propositioned by a Belgian prince.
Apparently while trying to get up from vomiting in the toilet I grabbed the seat cover for leverage and smashed my own head between it and the bowl. I don't remember this.
I paused mid sex to tell him I wished I'd taken up barrel racing so I could ride better.
I remember halftime. Then I woke up in Spain. I need a drink in order to process this.
He offered me handsanitizer after a hand job, you can't tell me he's not perfect!
No that one bar I got kicked out of got closed so that technically doesn't count
He just jumped up off the couch, screamed "ITS OVER NINE THOUSAND!" And then attempted to fly out the window like a bird. I don't know nor do I care to know what just happened
I'm trying to secure Christmas dick. Idgaf if he has strep or not.
It's only 3 AM. There's still time to get arrested today.
Randomize
