I guess we had a small kitchen fire somehow when we decided to bake fruitroll ups and croutons...
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
at roughly 3:30am you called me saying you were gonna start a big game of strip twister in politics class and i was your partner.
He keeps whispering to me that he can't wait to tie my hands up with my wig?
Recently successful and happy relationships are at an all time high now that you are no longer fucking so many peoples girlfriends. You alone have changed the mating patterns in the lower half of our county.
You need to stop relating my life to your schoolwork. But tell my girlfriend that she'd be proud.
He's minimum effort, but maximum fuck.
All you need to do now is invest in a Speedo and start going door to door.
Today marks the 365th consecutive day of jerkin it. I couldn't have done it without you guys. #onlynewyearsresolutionaccomplished
The man was doing everything in his power to get away from his wife, including go into the gay club.
Hey beautiful no judgement but why is there a bucket of KFC chicken in the bathtub??
I have 35 pounds of pennies. Need any?
he rolled over in the morning and told me happy valentines day. i don't even know his first name.
I woke up in a beaver hat and contruction vest.. I need answers.
I party with great urgency now.
Although, she is an extremely cool person. She put the "buddy" in "fuck buddy." And I mean that in the most respectful way possible.
Randomize