If i see another girl turn you down you should either turn gay or just kill yourself
By getting ready I mean putting baby powder in my hair and possibly changing my pajamas to another pair of pajamas
90 In a 65. Talked my way out of it with the i have to poop story. i am the ticket jesus
The 30 seconds of sex was almost worth it...I mean he did smoke me out and watched the princess and the frog with me
Please find an outlet that isn't stripping or getting drunk and arrested
I'm gonna make a therapist very happy and very wealthy this semester.
She said we could only have sex if she got to keep her fake moustache on during
Okay so for future reference and your own safety I should probably tell you that it is not cranberry juice in that bottle on the kitchen table.
Meanwhile I'm working a fucking flute workshop and I'm one high c away from shoving a flute up the asshole of the next passerby
Virgins should have to wear a badge. This burden is too heavy...
Even blacked out me knows not to sleep with socks on
You wanna know what I want to eat? Questionable Mexican food before I go drink. Makes for excitement. Will I puke it up or shit my pants
yes we're having sex but I'm texting you...so what does that tell you?
THREE MINUTES! THREE MINUTES PAST MIDNIGHT I STSRT HEARING CHRISTMAS MUSIC ON THE OVERHEAD PA SYSTEM!!!
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
Randomize