Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
making cat noises will not fix the situation.
So, during a 20 minute shower I spent 19 minutes spinning in circles and 1 minute licking the wall, and it was better than sex. I can't wait to do X again.
I wish i could be on x for the rest of my life.
I just watched her pee in a trashcan, im still probably going to fuck her, what does that say about my standards
i just kept saying he was red & i was blue and we couldnt become purple. I started crying at one point
And when he pulled me off the bathroom floor, he just looked at the cat litter stuck to my chin and said "oh sweetie" and shook his head. I think my dad's officially given up hope.
I couldn't get past the raccoon on my porch so i slept on my lawn.
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
Today I left one job interview, showed up randomly at his house for a midday bootycall then left right after to attend my second job interview. I got both jobs
I guess what I'm trying to get to is that my dog sneezed on my dick earlier and its really taken the joy out of my evening.
Got arrested last night. My cell mate just added me on Facebook.
theres a girl in the library eating whip cream out of a starbucks cup... only whip cream, im way to high for this shit
I like how I can go from sucking dick in the my basement to singing along to veggie tales with my family in a span of 10 minutes.
If I get my period the weekend your parents are gone i'm removing my uterus.
Randomize