Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
I have said "that's the wrong hole" for the last time.
The girl in the car behind me just took a bowl hit. I miss college.
im trying to make cookies in the george foreman
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
You don't care if I shave my legs, but you insist I be conscious for sex. Whatever. I really think your priorities are out of whack.
Hold on, I need to find something to wear that says "I don't contribute to your daughter's drug problem"
Also I've been at work for an hour and I've already been "honey"d "babe"d and "beautiful"d by three separate men. Apparently hungover with yesterdays make up looks good on me.
This strip club is mediocre. Talent is fine. Fung shui is bad.
His girlfriend left him for the pizza guy. I am not fucking kidding.
How am I supposed to buy weed and pancake mix when it's raining?
I'm super disappointed in my clit.
He wants me to fart in his mouth and is offering me SOOOO much coke. I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place. GIVE ME ADVICE.
thanks for passing me through your vagina 20 years ago today. your the best
People probably think I’m a fangirl bc I go to so many shows but it’s really bc I like fucking the tour manager
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