Sorry I totally forgot to text you back. When you texted me I was at work at the pharmacy and it was stupid busy. And then of course I had my 8 hour "shoot me b/c half of Loyola comes in to buy plan B" shift.
Hey when you come over to pick me up in the mornin bring a camera. This is going to be legendary. Don't knock.... They might cover up
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
it was a weeks worth of wine for $20. it would have been fiscally irresponsible to not buy it.
Taking my tights off outside the club to give them to the homeless man was my contribution to humanity. The fact that it was snowing just made me feel like superman.
I don't even know where to begin....there's queso sauce and public hair stuck to everything
I swear some just paged for more cock rings over the intercom.
I asked for my Beats earbuds back and he sent me a pic of them tied around his penis. Now I miss both my great ear buds and his great dick
I'm tripping balls on ambien right now and I still feel that's a bad idea.
So apparently they remodeled our middle school. Looks like we'll need to find a new roof to play beer pong on this summer.
I'm in my onesie attempting to spoon-feed myself cold soup. I'm playing freeze tag with my hangover. My hangover's winning.
when I called the strip club they said there was a note with my credit card. "girl who punched guy in throat" fuck daytona
First. I had the strength. Now. I am the death.
How much weed should I buy my mom for her birthday?
so we have roughly decided that hes the dude all the chicks will bang in college, just so he will do their term papers
Randomize
