I have to decide between the hot young blond with no apparent gag reflex, and the brunette with a great ass and a trust fund.
i threw up in a trash can last night at kellys irish times. but in a trash can because i'm a lady
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
After she threw up on my floor she started singing "this is why I'm hot."
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
If i evwr doyble fist jack daniels and smirnoff again, i hereby give you permission to take them both away grom me and give me and give me a glass of wat
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
How is it I was the last to know everyone calls me tig ole bitties? Did y'all have a meeting about this that I wasn't invited to?
I've never seen a homeless man jog to get off the bus and then run to his panhandling spot because he's "late for work," but you see something new every day.
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
My life is a clusterfuck of men and disorderly priorities right meow.
Wednesday is good, I needed the head count for the orgy, caroling can happen with as few as 2 people. There will be a pinata.
For the caroling or the orgy?
Dude. I don't even want cuddles. I just want an acknowledgement that I just had balls in my mouth.
I'm 2 weeks in to my all dick and carb diet and so far I've lost 2lbs.
I'm going to ride your dick until it falls off. That horny.
I'm equal parts terrified and turned on. Come over.
Randomize
