Ninja stars and alcohol are a bad combo
two more shots til everyone in this club gets to see my cesarean scars.
I don't really want to explain to you right now but i just ate laundry detergent
She came to college a virgin and left on court order. We ruined her.
Hung over. Bed full of legos for some reason. Not getting up. Come build stuff with me.
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
Well at least he is okay. If you call the fetal position in my living room floor "okay"...
Every time you blow me I should make a paper crane and we'll make them into a chain and hang them from the ceiling. And then whenever we have people over and they ask what the cranes are for I'll say "reminders" and wink at you.
She left me naked in my bed and without my phone I had her give me her phone number on the calculator on my laptop. It might be fake.
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
I've fucked 6 of my brothers' friends. I'm completely fine with him fucking the girl we ate lunch with.
I just found out the guy that lied and blew me off got arrested, his mugshot is online. Life is good.
Apparently at 2 AM I decided to let the world know about my newfound love for elephants
lonely sunday drunk me decided to tweeze my pubes. HORRIBLE IDEA
Is it disrespectful or patriotic to pole dance on an american flag pole?
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