is there any particular reason you took a shit in a zip lock bag and left it in my refrigerator?
you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
i blame lastnights decisions on friday the 13th
id pay someone 5 dollars to tell me whos house im at right now. comfy couch though
Omg calling you in 10 to update you on who I peed on last night
He told the cop he was underage, handed the cop his ID, and the police report read "I then informed the suspect that he was not, in fact, underage"
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
do you know where my other puke covered boot is
Girl re-adjusts bra, no one bats an eye. I re-adjust nuts, everyone stares.
i need to un-sleep with a few of those brothers before we ever go back to that house again. i'm serious. i will not be a fraternity groupie.
Please tell me how the stripper got back to Sarah's from the trailer park
I said his dick tasted like a Hawaiian Sweet Roll. And then I yelled MAHALO.
I turned on Elf, made myself a mojito, and am eating one of a sleeve of Ritz. You tell me if I wanna go out tonight.
Randomize
