I'm good, just tired from chardonnay and giving hand jobs.
We're so high we're finding things in the room to build a submarine with. So far we have two cardboard boxes, a piece of wood, puffy paint, and an empty bottle to use as a periscope.
You sprayed lemon pledge on your crotch because it was "dusty"
He's my palate cleanser. He's my mint sorbet. He's my saltine cracker. He's who I fuck between people to make the next one better.
lets be honest. she's not NEARLY as much fun to fb creep since she got out of rehab...
I know. I know. The man who pulled me from my mother's womb was the same man who had his fingers in my vagina today. My life is a joke. I don't know how to feel about this.
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
I have a pocket in my purse that is just for condoms and cocktail swords. I feel like that speaks volumes about me as a person
dude i should have never cleaned my ears out while high. theres no going back.
This is what my life has come to. Like, I may or may not have just stolen pizza from the guy I just hooked up with's fridge when I left...
it's too much effort for something that isn't food.
I told him that I wanted his dick like I wanted a jumbo hot dog. There something wrong with my priorities
should we try and roll a cross joint since its good friday? you know, for jesus
How high?! We watched paid programming for 45 minutes before we realized it wasn't just a long commercial. So pretty high. The Bionic fish finder looks promising, though.
Lets get a boat first.
His dick is curly. It's adorable.
Randomize