So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
He came in the heat vent in my car. Don't ask how it happened.
he spent the whole night trying to convince me into a2m. i won't even use the pb til i clean the jelly knife. i love him but it's not going to happen.
By the way, shout wipes are a gift from god for people that throw up on themselves.
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
he's speaking broken english and calling me isaac.. this is not the australian i ordered for a one nighter
Bright side: maybe hell start being nice to you now that you know he has erectile dysfunction.
Don't think anyone else in the building has a lunchbox full of yay
Hey there's a sandwich in there too!
THERE IS A GOAT THERE IS A GOAT IN MY BED IT IS EATING MY THONG WHAT DID YOU DO
This is embarrassing but i think i might have left my fake tooth at your house on your night stand.
Good morning sunshine. Care to hear the riveting tale of Michelle and the Almost Great Night That Ended In An Early Morning of Karma Emptying It's Bowels On Her Guilty Shoulders?
i woke up inside a girl that i promised i would take on a date to Chili's
Let’s try it, I’ve never had a bad time with sex, tacos and beer.
Having sex with him is like yoga. I do it in the morning and then can't walk for three days afterwards.
all I remember is them saying he had a big dick and the next thing I know I’m leaving with him
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