we need to stop having unprotected sex.
ya i know. we're like the secret life of the american whores.
Bad idea. College students cannot afford both alcohol and a cat. Unless said cat is irish, and can feed itself with fifths of whisky.
Oh you're gonna love this story. I almost cut off a little girl's pony tail.
I have officially had sex in every room on my floor. Don't say I'm not an amazing RA.
the creek. my friends left me at a party next thing i know im in a breaststroke relay race with a bunch of randos in the dark
Oh god I may vomit into the teacup of debauchery.
Its what happens when I drink whiskey in a sweater. It makes me feel mature and ponderful.
You're either a hooker or Beyonce. Beyonce is abnormally good at doing everything in heels
Im not coming back to that place until im drunk. If I walk in there sober Ill start screaming uncontrollably. Not words, just sounds.
That's just weird. That doesn't make sense sexually at all. I mean, you might as well tape a pen to the tip and try and write your name while you're at it.
if there is one thing you splurge on it better be nice condoms
I just googled: how soon can I pee on a stick. What is my life coming to.
I feel like an involuntary Mother Theresa. I DON'T WANT TO BE ABSTINENT!
Fine I’ll come with you but you better tell that guy to wear some longer shorts because the second I see a rogue nut I’m gone
What is the best medium with which to say, "Happy Birthday, I'm having your abortion"... Cake? Card?
Randomize
