I am so gay it hurts my loins. Going to see She's Just Not That Into You... again. Ohhh my goodness.
the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
If this place produced love children they would be born wearing Lilly Pullitzer with raging coke addictions.
If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
I woke up with a Nike swoosh shaved into my chest hair. my friend got 3 stitches. my phone had a text that simply read "fuck you". I say it was a good party.
He tried peeing out of the sunroof.
once you started introducing yourself as "running-bear" i knew you were beyond fucked up
We're gonna take a moment of silence to pray... that his penis is as pretty and as talented as his brothers.
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
I'm gonna fingerblast you when you get off work. Get ready.
NO TEQUILA
Why do I always think it's a good idea? Like a challenge? Shit maybe I should CHALLEGE myself to get laid for once instead
Talking to him sober hurts my brain
Because it's not worth it. And there is no nice way of saying "sorry, you're not good enough at sex for me to drive 45 mins"
His whole street is under construction. Third walk of shame this week & I'm getting a lot of sympathetic nods from the workers.
I got asked to "be the filling in a man sandwich." You don't get to pick the club again. EVER.
Randomize
