After he came all over my face, he proceeded to give me a high five. I can't even act upset because I always put myself in these situations. Did I mention D3: Mighty Ducks was playing in the background?
I always feel awkward when im sitting at home watching the price is right and the fat contestant get the gym equipment.
I seriously need 2 stop fake jacking off in peoples faces at work...the I.T. Guy just showed me the security surveillance tapes.
My dad just knocked on my door and told me that my vibrator was too loud
For the record, a bath beer is far superior to a shower beer...
It's like a puppy that we have to take care of at all times or else she'll get sad, lonely, and chew on the furniture. And by 'chew on the furniture', I mean have anonymous sex.
Dude you were tripping so badly we put a pretend box around your head and you spoke silently for the rest of the night. I think pterodactyls were involved.
It's that moment where you find out the girl you've been dating for 6 months is a mob daughter. Post breakup.
It's like a harem of immaturity and bad ideas...and that's coming from me
Aaand now my client contact has seen your boobs.
Is it bad form to spend company money and place an ad in the paper because I wanna nail the sales girl?
I never imagine I'd say this, but can I ask Jeff for the butt plugs back even though it was a gift and we broke up?
NOT PREGNANT HIGH FIVE!
ok first of all what the fuck
It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.
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