Most awkward thing ever: Meeting your BattleShits opponent post war.
Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
If we have to be apart I understand. Being separated is probably best for our relationship now. I look forward to our booty calls.
Not only have I fallen off the wagon, it ran me over and just kept going...
I am the slutty bisexual glue that holds this friendship group together.
Is it true if I say your name three times, you'll appear and whore everything up?
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
I take it that, because we are not guzzling a box of franzia, everything went alright?
Puke, feathers, beads, and solo cups all on my way to class. I'm surprised anyone's alive after this weekend.
I was grossed out that all their candles smelled like vagina and then I remembered where my fingers had been.
I want to be your penis for a week.
So besides your brother walking in on you shaving and singing "I'm gonna get asssss" how was your night
Let's go buy marshmallows and play chubby bunny until we feel alive again
I can't hangout tonight, I have a phone sex appointment at 10
God damn you Coronavirus! I'm jonesing I got the itch. I would fully satisfy a horse for some Taco Bell or Perkins. God help me I'm going insane but I definitely don't want to get sick.
Randomize
