careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
I fuked that chick last night and she kept saying, "oh...oh....oh", like Bill Lumberg
so what did you do?
I did the mash I did the monster mash It was a graveyard smash!
and i think we compared dick sizes, then high fived...
I'm watching ellen!
just because im gay does not mean you need to notify me every time you watch the ellen degeneres show
This is your monthly public service announcement that sexual services will temporarily cease from Wednesday night to Monday. Please plan accordingly and have a nice day =D
I think the guy I was trying to dance with was an undercover cop...
If I drank a glass of water for every drink I had I'd die of water intoxication like some tweaked out looser at a rave
I was wasted and the time changed. I blame the male strippers.
Goodbye spring break, hello depressing video on AIDS.
I AM OFFERING YOU ALCOHOL AND THE CHANCE TO LET ME SAY FUCK IT TO MY RESPONSIBILITIES. HOW MANY TIMES DOES THIS HAPPEN?!
SHE BROUGHT HER PARROT TO THE PARTY. IT SQUAWKS EVERY TIME SOMEONE VOMITS LIKE 'PARTY FOUL SQUAWKKKKKK'
He offered to let her do a line of coke off his hard-on. She said she'd had that hard-on and it would be a bump, not a line. Everyone laughed. That's why he left.
So that answers the first question but not the second: how the fuck am I getting home?
he's 22 and listens to dad music. if i hear one more modest mouse song i'll never blow him again
I had a threesome last night with my fiance' and our soon to be best man. Everyone is surprisingly chill about it this morning. Is this any indication of what the wedding night will be like?
You have such a talent for this
Friendship, or finding weed?
Yes
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