It's true. Ladies love me because I'm so strong and they feel safe. Not because of my pseudo charm and their impaired judgement after several drinks...
do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
how ive managed to spend 100$ at an open bar is beyond me.
Fist pumping is hard when country music is playing FYI but I am committed
Tell me why Im cashing out of Walmart with Smirnoff and catfood
we need to stop having unprotected sex.
ya i know. we're like the secret life of the american whores.
I just saw her punch a kid in the face.. i always knew she was the girl for me.
No I'm not proud of you for not sleeping with him. He has herpes. You don't get a gold star for behaving how you're expected to. Trust me. I'm a teacher.
I'm drugging my best friend. I'm like a whole new level of bitch.
i dont know what was worse.. snorting the wasabi or puking on the neighbors dog
Going through my purse trying to find money for this cab but all I keep pulling out if chicken from my burrito o ate an hour ago. Help?
I'm pretty sure I made out with a guy in a man thong.
If you got me high enough to laugh at a ceiling fan until I shat my pants you should at least have the decency to buy me another pair
Nice. Make him jerk off and tape it. Send it to his woman. I also love that you had another skype date
good morning. i just did a walk of shame in front of his grandmother.
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