There's a 34yo winking at me. Why do i find this weird when my bf is a 38yo married man?
he just stuck his car key in my belly button, made car starting noises and pretended like i was revving my engine?
woke up with ski boots on and a kayak in my room... birthday successful? i'd say so
His internet history had "Disney Porn" on it.
my mom just poured a water bottle of wine to take my dog on a walk...
We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
his profile picture is a blurry one of him holding a beer. i recognized him instantly.
I had to call maintenance to come unclog the toilet.
Something to remember me by.
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
Apparently I'm not allowed to call at 3am anymore and ask to speak to all his siblings. I was just trying to get to know the family
I wonder how he feels knowing that he's the one who turned me gay
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
Woah don't start going all boyfriend on me now, you're here for one thing and one thing only and that's sex, hot shameless sex.
Thank you for always being there for me.
Sorry wrong derek... Do u have any weed?
I would totally suck a dick for some poutine right now
Randomize