I don't understand why she insists on me walking her to the door. She came over for literally 8 minutes, we had sex, and now I need her to leave. That fake chivalry will change nothing about the situation.
dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
theres a dog humping me and im not going to stop it... i really need to get laid.
Went home with a 29 year old from the bar. Life lesson: 9 year olds stay up late sometimes
remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
Don't judge me. It was less weird than it sounds when we were in the moment and it was his birthday
I feel like college is just one giant drunken trip to Taco Bell
Pre-crushing the pills for tomorrow morning. This way I can sleep in an extra 10 minutes.
there are ass prints on the hood of my car.
you got me arrested i just think that goes without question you owe me a blowjob
He recognized me by my ass from about 15 yards away. I must have a REALLY nice ass.
He told me"I think your ready for this" and went into his closet whipped out a movie certiffied light saber.
you should come have a drink with me (non alcoholic or otherwise) im at the same bar as your sister and a few guys that would apparently "lick your butthole"-congratulations
I have mastered the art of having sex on monkey bars.
I basically spent the entire weekend in bed with that red head.Every time I tried to leave she got me too horny to think straight. I was kidnapped by vagina
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