why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
I just barfed on his mom.
You told him you were too drunk to meet his parents. Totally his fault.
I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
Just so you know, each of my boobs fits perfectly in a martini glass.
You American Chicks are so confusing....1 day you are on my nuts next day you be trippin
Dude its not just American chicks...a small penis is the same in every language
My gynecologist inadvertently complimented your penis.
It was the worst sex ever. All she did was tap on my balls with her hands like she was in a reggae band.
It's what America was founded on: former hookups referring you for a job four years later.
pretty sure I called you last night to sing Hebrew to you.
its cute though when you google his name more than one mug shot comes up from different states
i went out at 5pm and cant remember anything until 3am...i was at the bus stop parking lot running around doing the Arrested Development chicken calls.
I'm getting a car wash man. I am go get a car wash high.
I just thought you should know.... I am fully committed to being a ho this summer
MY TITS JUST CAUSED A CAR ACCIDENT ON THE HIGHWAY! i kid you not!! i thinl the giy is actually dead
He told me their parents think of me as the "drunk friend"...oddly enough, I'm ok with that
Randomize
