We are surrounded by old people. Heavens waiting room for sure.
You work out of a Hotel?
Anderson Cooper interviews Obama. It's like CNN is teasing and broadcasting my dream 3 way.
we put the last xanax in the middle and played hungry hungry hippos to see whod get it
fair is fair
i just masturbated in footie pajamas. there's no judgement here.
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
Well I'm 85-90% sure that he licked syrup off my body, but no guarantees...
I mean, I love her. But not "I'll have a threesome with her." Type of love.
The party got hot, we all started raging, took off some clothes, someone threw me in the shower and we all kept raging. Nude Rager, I was there at the point of conception.
How was it playing wingman?
I feel like I was rockys coach watching him get the shit beaten out of him by Apollo creed
I was thinking that, but I'm not sure the proper etiquette on asking about someone's nipple rings. Even if you did see them and compliment them once.
Just had to double check that I had pants on. THAT kind of weekend.
You said "I feel like a koala bear. Do you ever just feel like a koala bear?" This is your brain on drugs.
Hypothetically speaking of course, is it bad if a cat eats lube?
He was actually surprised when I poured myself a glass full of straight vodka. Clearly he doesn't know me as well as he thinks.
Randomize
