all you did was keep googling "what time is it" over and over and over
he was writing an apology letter to his liver in shakespearean english... That much fun...
Why do you keep getting laid in MY dreams
I'm glad you trust me to be your sex stat keeper.
Some one left their pants in the elevator.
Drunkkker than when I told the drag queen she was prettier than me
I said geronimo as I came I'm not sure if he appreciated the doctor who reference or was just confused
LOVE ME MORE THAN PIZZA CAN
To drink from my fkask next to a cop car or to not drink from my flask next to a cop car
Oh and apparently something happened that was related to "THIS IS SPARTA" but no one will tell me what I did.
So I'm going to blame my boobs hurting on that.
She proceeded to flip everyone off then open a Heineken with her teeth.
I have a story for you. It involves waffles and getting naked with the local weatherman.
I mean...he danced with his dick still inside of me. What more could a girl ask for?
The end of the friendship was inevitable. I hooked up with her cousin and forgot to mention it to her
Life is clearly unfair. You remember Courtney has three older sisters, well they're all "make baby sister look like a four" hot. I knew I shouldn't go home with her.
Randomize
