He's been sleeping iwht ***
Nooo
Yeah I don't even know how, she looks like her mom smoked crack while she was in the womb
And then hit her in the face with a shovel
the people going to church this morning while i was walking home did not seem as pleased as i was with how many beads i earned last night
My mom asked me if I was being satisfied, sexually. And then discussed positioning.
And i generally try not to roofie people when I'm in a committed relationship.
I may do that, fyi I'm even more sore than I was yesterday. It's like the ghost of your dick is still inside me.
I think being an adult is being able to say no to free shots...I need to work on that.
The moment you realize you should grow up: you're snorting your fathers percocet script with your old health insurance card, while your parents are on a 10 day cruise in the carribean...
This morning I got out of bed 4 HOURS LATE, made eggs with a plastic beach shovel, and then ate them using pens like chopsticks in my bed with my turtle. Obviously, I am not in the mood to be proactive with my life today...
Right now Tom has the 2nd floor office bathroom under siege. He shit/clogged one toilet, and he's throwing up in the sink.
He carried you out but the best part is you kept saying "can't I keep dancing" as you were gushing blood
Man, that hitchhiker cursed me.
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
I would give a kidney to fuck him and he knows it. That bastard.
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
He said they were his favorite shoes.. So I threw one down the sewer. Now he'll keep searching the house for the other one. Sweet silent revenge.
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