seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
i told the bartender last night that if the palace saloon made a calendar he would be every month.
I told him that he could only go home with me if he didn't talk or tell me his name
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
Places you have drunkenly threatened to piss: my bed, my bros bed, my moms bed, my bros wedding
I love that the power of margaritas brought us back together.
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
I'm gonna make a therapist very happy and very wealthy this semester.
and then we all passionately sang "what if god was one of us" until everyone passed out in the grass
Drugs are gluten free tho, right?
My day in three words: secret purse cake
He ordered a meatball sub with a side of meatballs.
If I hear you use the phrase "silky soft scrotum" one more time I swear to God you'll regret it
He ran out to tell us that somebody flooded the bathroom, then went back in there fell on his ass and asked why the floor was wet
What? No, wine isn't my weakness, I just love it.
Randomize
