Peanut Butter and turkey sandwich...this may come back to haunt me
I hate when people uglier than me have girlfriends
why do all the strippers look like they came from fraggle rock
Your sister got a Brazilian yesterday. It looks great
He walked in and put an x made out of tape on the floor. He then announced that he was going to pass out there. Cocky or strategic?
The Shake Weight not only toned my arms but significantly improved my hand job form and efficiency.
I still can't figure out why that's not in the commercial.
Pretty sure that Albanian broad gave me something last night. Now we play the waiting game.
Haha so I huess that means he's a little over 7. I can use my throat as a ruler!!
One less school supply you need to buy!!
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
I kind of learned that hotels are unnecessary. Boys will just take you home, but that's tough with a group. I believe in us, though.
How could you give up sex for lent? I gave up religion for lent years ago and never looked back. Or give up civility, not sex.
Just saw a dude walk out of the parking. Garage in a diaper and tutu. He had a handle in one hand and a toy bow in the other
LOL its 11 am
A man just squeezed past me in a tight space and said, "Excuse us."
He said he doesnt believe in the female orgasm,so no I did not have sex with him.
TURNS OUT they were both cheating. Like the Gift of the Magi except for shitty people
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