Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
Thank god i puked near the cancer center. makes me look like a chemo patient
Tell me you remember me getting a tampon from the girl throwing up in the next stall
She started crying and told me to leave half way through, I'm walking down main with a bottle of patron and a sweatpants boner.
this better not be you asking for a beej
110% paid for our cab with a lap dance
Um yeah. I just puked. And found your contact.
My bathing suit kept falling whenever I went under a wave and this kid caught on and kept checking them out so I told him nothing comes free $5 a boob
Please warn me if you ever end up in porn, cause I don't want to stumble across that on accident, okay?
Her ex wouldn't stop texting her so she started replying with various pictures of Britney spears's breakdown
DROP EVERYTHING! Gatta go get tested for herpes, lets make an adventure out of it.
Had to sacrifice my vibrator batteries to the thermostat gods. I had a dirty dream and also almost a heat stroke.
I am more than mildly offended he didn't screenshot the snapchat of my boobs.
Woke up on a lawn chair hugging a bottle of vodka. Hows your morning so far?
Girl just left one of the apts upstairs carrying a giant bottle of kahlula and a lunchable.... I feel like we could be friends
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