I dont shave on purpose to keep myself from being slutastic!! it usually works
haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
you're putting all your eggs in a very hungover basket
dressing as green man for st patrick's day = free drinks all night long
I always know the weekend is over when the real license comes out and the fake goes back into the hiding spot.
the awesomeness of being snowed in wore off after we ran out of beer and we realized we really didnt want to be stuck with everyone.
I think the best part was when you jumped over me naked.
Ha, I bet. You tipped the waitress like 10 bucks for a glass of water.
after she pushed someone down the stairs to get more vodka we lost her for a while and found her on the pole in the garage pouring water on herself
I'm hurting so bad I actially had to wait for my mini wheats to get soggy before I could eat them..
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
And then she said "wanna make a vine of me twerking on the wall?"
As if I wouldn't steal Nintendo brand "Mario is my HOMEBOY!" boxers when he gave me the entire drawer to choose from.
So nothing to worry about, but i'm probly going to jail soon, just thought i should let you know so you didn't worry. Bye!
I tried saying sorry but instead I puked down her shirt and tried to clean it up... Now I have a bruise on my forehead. good news, before she left she wrote her number on my stomach with sharpie
Randomize
