Smith looks like a guy that goes on a lot of first dates
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
She has her iPod in her ears slippers and sweats on and is walking around the house up and down the stairs getting "exercise" she just stopped for a water break
i want the original willy wonka imagination song to come on when i take a girl to my room
He wants to call Lloyd's of London and have my mouth insured.
the crazy preacher outside Willard just began a monologue that began with "when i look at a vagina." We should stop by there more often
FUUUUUCK she froze all my quaters inside the ice cubes again
You said "It's ok guys, I know I'm not really a turtle" and then tried walking on the lake.
listening to the two girls in the next stall finish a 40 and laugh at this guy they both fucked. they're calling him 'tulip dick'.
I'm just sad for you. It sucks that the 17 douchebag asshole guys you're fucking can't morph into one nice, normal, non-alcoholic guy that has a drivers license and no criminal history.
Here's my first problem: I'm drunk
He's texting from midnight mass asking for nude pics. Baby Jesus is spinning in his manger as we speak
I wish everyone could suck his dick. It was an honor.
90% sure the total babe I have been talking to all night has a kid. Ugh, so sad right now.
Im so high
I need to go to St. Louis more often. The brides sorority sisters were practically fighting over me once they heard I work on Wall St.
Randomize
