well that one time I was being a total idiot trying to see how much I could drink. turns out 22 shots is too much. surprise surprise! ambulance party!
It's always a relief to be able to look at some one, and remind yourself that there IS some one who gets laid less then yourself.
We've finally become those guys who you'd see in middle school when you went to the park who are just stoned out of their minds sitting on the swings.
he calls his bong barack obonga, commander in kief. i found where i belong.
My relaxing drive may end up as a surprise bootycall in Pittsburgh. Don't try to stop me.
Desperately trying not to throw up over the side of the ferry back to CT. Can't be the first one of the season.
We left the bar in 2 bicycle cabs. It cost thirty bucks and they took us to the wrong hotel. When we finally made it to the right one we ended up in a room with three randos from alaska. Jammed out with them for like an hour. Those inuits are good guitar players
I woke up next to him fully clothed but my thong was around his neck. Polling to decide if we had sex or not starts now.
I just swallowed some ecstasy stuck in my nose from last night. Work should be interesting.
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
I was wondering why are people staring at me til I realized I was bra-less with a lei around my neck
Seriously. All I want right now is a 40 with a nipple on it, and a nap
Everyday this week I have woken up to a different dick pic. It's like a dick pic a day calendar!
If I hear you use the phrase "silky soft scrotum" one more time I swear to God you'll regret it
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
Randomize
